For a large part of my existence, I was unable to detect a person from a pretender. A steady diet of TV watching as a young person without parental guidance kind of blurred the boundaries between fantasy of Hollywood and reality.

For example, I went to visit a local parish to see whether what I discovered to be true was related to the broader world of religious belief. Let’s just say I was consulting the religious professionals.

I know now, after much rigorous examination of reality, that every person dressed as a priest isn’t necessarily a priest. A fireman may be other things besides a fireman. You can pretend your an Indian, but that is not necessarily so.

After experiencing a grand ceremony worthy of a Being I consulted in my Chronicles, the priest invited everyone for meal and discussion afterwards. I asked him what made his denomination different than Protestantism, which is rooted deeply in American culture.

He said: His denomination has “the correct” interpretation of Jesus’ words. “Jesus needs an interpreter?”

The Being I’ve been talking to seems to not require interpretation. He’s pretty reasonable and clear. What kind of God can’t speak to people in their own language? Is this guy’s god Greek?

He roared at me that I may not interpret scripture (the words of Jesus) myself. I needed help!

That I needed help was not in dispute. That’s why I was asking him a question. Why his denomination (according to him) superior to all others? How does he know his is “Correct?” He said, “Trust me.”

Then he laid out the prerequisites for my soul being saved: A lifelong commitment to his denomination, to obey (him -as God representative on earth), and to do it with joy. To spend my entire life immersed in religious exercises – awash in his denomination’s interpretation (which may or may not be correct) and I will never know because I cannot know God for myself.

Then, I realized I could listen to this guy the rest of my life and still not know what he’s talking about. At the end of which, it’s not clear whether I may then ‘know’ God for myself or not. Neither have I any way of measuring what he is saying is actually true or not because (according to him) that is a special gift only he possesses.

My bullsh**-o- meter is throbbing right now. He lost me at: “Jesus needs an interpreter.